Wedding Gowns

What is it? What is my fascination with wedding gowns?? My newest guilty pleasure, Girl meet Gown, is totally voyeuristic and judgmental, and yet, I can't get enough....when the girl walks in with a stack of bridal magazines I break into a giddiness that can't be explained - I think to myself, she's too big to go strapless, too tiny to go ballgown...EEEK! It's Goldilocks and the three gowns! This one is too big, this one is too small....this one makes me cry...I got all gooey when a bride came out crying because she knew that this was the dress....and it was.

Watching this show provides insight into the rise of the modern "Bridezilla" - you can look at the bride and see if she is going to alienate all of her friends and family by the wedding day or if she'll be as sweet and happy as she is shown. And in their gown selection, they reveal more about themselves and their relationships with their friends and family - does her mother love her selection, is she supportive, jealous, wistful, ecstatic? Are the friends jealous, spiteful, cruel?

I love the show especially for the staff and owners of the bridal salon - they handle themselves with such grace and humor. They understand that they are working with women at their most vulnerable - getting married. They understand the bride who changes her mind, whose wedding isn't going to happen, and who wants/needs to lose weight to fit into the gown she has dreamed of since she was 10.

A big thank you to the brides on the show - I appreciate being a part of your special day. You all are beautiful -

Children

God love the little ones! We were all there once, try as we may to forget.....the Washington Post had an interesting article in the Sunday paper regarding the balance between people with children vs people without and the daily struggles businesses and individuals deal with the mostly unspoken conflict.

Being someone who has no children, just dogs, I feel the angst when arriving at a restaurant with small children nearby and they are running around or playing with their food. I don't blame the child, I blame the parents for allowing this behavior. I was raised by parents who believed that children didn't go out to public places, such as restaurants or church, until I could behave properly. If that meant my parents went to separate services to allow one of them to be at home, that is what they did. If it meant no restaurant dinners with me and my brother, they did it. I understand the want for parents to be out of the house and enjoying their lives with their friends, and inevitably their friends' children, but they tend to forget that everyone else is there to enjoy themselves too!

But I also see the side of the parent who needs to go out and doesn't want to give in to their life changing just because they have children. It's tough to eat at home with multiple small children and miss out on being served and not having to clean up the dishes. I get it - but I do think parents forget about the larger responsibility they have - to acknowledge when their little darlings are not prepared to be in public - be it they are a little sick, they are squirmy, prone to temper tantrums, and all the other behaviors that are disruptive to others in the room.

There must be an admission that life changes with children - not every option is as available to parents with little ones as easily as life before them. It's not a slight on parents, it's not a slight on non-parents, it is just life. Parents can choose to bring their children to restaurants but need to show the responsibilty to remove them if they begin disruptive behaviors. I've seen many a well-behaved child completely enamored with a book or crayons during an adult dinner and always make an effort to acknowledge the parents and their lovely child or children.

So, as every issue in life, it's a matter of personal responsibility.

Love is a many splendid thing?

That most tumultuous of human emotions, love has its highs and lows, its ups and downs, coupled with days of angst and nights of passion. So how do you keep the music playing? How do you maintain the individual in the duality? I don't know the answer. Is it worth the trouble - absolutely. I do believe however that love should come with a warning label - do not use with heavy machinery.

great women we/ve lost

We've had several prominent African American women pass recently. Dorothy Height and Lena Horne - two women who dedicated their lives in very different ways to the fight for equality in America. One stood tall with presidents, one stood tall on the stage and screen and both have left a legacy of integrity, authenticity, and sophistication. Ms Height had her hats, Ms Horne had her voice and beauty - we are richer as a nation for them both. May they rest in peace with the knowledge that they will be remembered as fighting the good fight and making a difference in the lives of so many.

Generational Rant

So I'm reading the NYT and come across a book review http://www.nytimes.com/2010/05/09/weekinreview/09aoscott.html?pagewanted=1, and it talks about Gen X and its midlife crisis. It discusses the irony of a generation having a midlife crisis when it hasn't yet accomplished anything. I would agree - those of us in this group are stuck between the Baby Boomers who control everything - it's all about them and they won't let the rest of us forget about it. Get off the freakin stage already! If you're gonna bankrupt the nation with your neverending quest for youth and vitality - do it now and get it over with - don't draw it out - get those replacement knees and hips so that you can power walk into your golden geriatric years - like the Grinch, don't leave a crumb for the generation behind you - make them work for it they way you had to - though as children of the Greatest Generation, I would argue that they didn't work for it, it was given to them because their parents wanted a better life for their children - I'm not so sure the Baby Boomers wish that to their children or they would have acted more selflessly.

Is Gen X a bunch of whiners and dreamers lost in the what-ifs of our decisions - absolutely. But is it a frustration born in being the generation that no one will remember? or is it a reflection of the narcissism of our parents that they helped foster - only the history books will know. In the meantime, I'll keep counting the days for the Baby Boomers to give up their seats at the table and make room for the Gen Xers - like Prince Charles, we'll keep wishing you good health but will we be sad when you're gone?

Careers

what constitutes a career? used to be that entire lives were spent with one employer - a "company man" was the phrase of the 50s and early 60s - now, we are individual commodities eaking out the best offer for now and constantly looking for the next step. We don't or shouldn't believe that someone isn't angling for our job the moment our business cards are delivered. Everyone looks over their shoulder at the next bright star coming from behind. "You're only as good as your last mistake," tends to be a rule not the exception. So while we're constantly re-inventing ourselves are we truly in a state to give 150 percent to our current roles? or are we too busy looking down the hall at the corner office? Is a career the document that shows are employment trail or is it a set of ideals we maintained throughout our professional jobs? Do I have a career in communications or do I have a career in trying to be a good friend, a trusted co-worker, and ethical behavior? Just some random synapses -

Love in literature

Over the last month I have read the Vampire series by Stephanie Meyer. I never expected to read them, I especially didn't anticipate being drawn into a plotline and characters as fully as I have been. While the plot is over the top - werewolves and vampires all in one small sleepy town, what I did find were amazing complicated relationships - Bella and Edward, Bella and Jacob, Carlisle and Esme, etc. The overarching theme about relationships that I am seeing is that they are complicated, each person brings their own special skills to them, patience and understanding is necessary, someone is always going to be disappointed and you can hurt the ones you love. Pretty heady stuff for tweenage girls to relate to. The vampires are cursed with beauty and eternal life and yet still gather as families - the werewolves do the same with their impressions of one true soulmate. The books also show the importance of belonging and how everyone belongs somewhere - everyone has a home regardless of how unique or freakish one may feel.