Moments of clarity

It has been mentioned to me that I'm a bit bitter in my commentary - I prefer to say biting social criticism but you say tomahto, I say tomayto - :) So this past weekend, I went hiking in Lost River State Park - a beautiful day, neighbors down the street had come out for the weekend to the cabin, just the makings of a great day! We arrived at the beginning of the trail which was taking us to a ridge 3700 feet up a mountain and it was right by the horse stables which take people on riding tours of the park. There was a guide and two visitors mounted on their horses in front of us ready to begin their ascent. This one horse cantered by me and she had the most beautiful big blue eyes - and as she passed me, I felt her look right at me - her blue eyes locking with my blue eyes - I had a moment of clarity that we're all part of an amazing experience of life. There's so much magic, wonder, and awe around us if we allow ourselves the moment to see it. Most people would look at the horse and be done, I took a moment to appreciate the pure beauty and grace of her. We're all connected, be we animals, humans, trees, ants, and yes - even snakes. The magic is in understanding and appreciating the interdependency, the emotional fulfillment , and the happiness - pure happiness, that can be gained from making a moment to connect, truly connect, with the world right around you.

Bitter, nah, jaded perhaps, but always amazed and awed.

What we have become

I'm really angry and worried about what our nation is becoming. The recent frenzy of craziness regarding the 14th Amendment and the mosque in NYC has brought out the absolute worst examples of "leadership" and public citizenry that I can recall. Do we really as a nation believe that we are not a nation of immigrants and religious tolerance? Do we really believe that our Founding Fathers would have had such issues with a religious center? I cannot believe that elected officials and political pundits will use the Constitution and the Bill of Rights to their own benefits in whatever way it suits them. They will justify homophobia, control a woman's right to choose what to do with her own body, the sanctity of marriage, the right to bear assault arms to "hunt".....what won't they do?

If I remember correctly, the United States was founded as a new experiment ensuring life, liberty, and the pursuit of happiness - that all men are created equal with certain inalienable rights - to its citizenry. That's what has made us strong and unique. But democracy is an experiment and 1,000 years from now, as we look back and study the empires of Rome and Greece today, will history books look as this small blip of 200 and some odd years of the United States with amazement at its rise and fall or as the spark that brought forth and spread the light of freedom of expression, religion, and the rights of the individual. I can say today that I am afraid of the answer.

Nature vs Nurture - not the argument you think

I read a review of a study to be published regarding personality traits being set as early as first grade. In this study which followed individuals from first grade to adulthood, it was discovered that however you were in first grade you basically are going to be like throughout life. It was funny to read that, just last week my mother was commenting to me about what a happy kid I was - and how I was still like that....I guess that study would work out well for me :) But what about others - how horrible if your mother were to say to you - you whined then and you're still whining...or you were such a drama queen and you still are (I have several friends whose mothers I'd like to check this fact out with!)

This then led to me to think how much easier life would be if we all had to wear signs or better yet, our driver's license had a little box indicating what are character traits were in first grade - teacher's pet? pant wetter? get over that chalk-eating problem? Better than Myers-Brigg, this would immediately share insight as to the possible friendship, dating material, or collegiality in the workplace for each of us. How much easier could it be than to go to a job interview and have someone ask, "so you didn't play well with your brother, how will that affect your group project work today?", or "tell me about your violent behavior toward Raggedy Ann?" Well, umm....I was in first grade, I didn't know better," ain't gonna cut the mustard anymore.

Consumer Vents At Target For Right-Wing Donation

If you can make it there

So dramatic - but I do believe the world changes faster than we can all comprehend, and it takes us regular humans some time to realize that the ground beneath our feet is quicksand....following my trip in the Sshhhhhh car, I attended a conference in NYC - well, let's back up to my feelings about the Big Apple - I LOVE IT! I was fortunate enough to have parents who took me to the city quite often during the course of my childhood. I saw amazing shows - Dreamgirls in its first week open with Barry Manilow and Lucille Ball (who I met at dinner earlier in the evening) sitting at the end of my row in the audience, Patti LuPone in Evita among others - it truly was where I wanted to be. Of course, when the time came to go to college, New York was the only city off the list, parents were afraid the arts had me in its clutches - which it did.....often wonder what restaurant or retail establishment I'd be working in had I persued that path....how different.....alas, that's not THIS post - :)

So I check in to the conference hotel, the Marriott Marquis, right on Times Square. Now, I have been very aware of the cleaning up of the area to make it more "family friendly" - well, they have succeeded in the Middle Americanizing of one of the most amazing spaces on the planet! If I have to see one more TGIFridays or M&M Store I think my head would explode! Why is it necessary to always remain in the bubble of which we live - what happened to the adventure in life - why wouldn't a family from Iowa or anywhere for that matter enjoy the experience of the local flavor?? What's the deal that we have to go to the same chain restaurants and stay in our comfort bubble? I had Sunday night free so I decided to wander out and grab a bite. I walked away from Times Square and the hoards of families in Mickey Mouse tshirts and flip flops and stumbled upon the Stage deli - I've been to two delis in NYC - the Stage and the Carnegie - both have sandwiches that defy gravity - they serve mouth watering corned beef, pastrami, and have the best pickles!! So, I popped into the Stage for a bite to eat. I sat at the bar and immediately was struck by a note of sadness - the sparkle, the energy, the "je ne sais quoi" - was not there. It was like a woman whose makeup from the night before is in need of some "refreshing"....I thought was it me or was it New York that had changed? The food was delicious - pickles like before but it was just tired. It was tired of upholding a NYC landmark that no one appreciates any longer - like the guest who stayed too long at the party and didn't realize the hosts had gone to bed.

I saw tourists approach the door and ask to see a menu, look at it, and then leave!?? How, how I say could you do that - just look at the plates in front of those who can appreciate the absolute heaven two slices of rye bread, with mounds of pastrami and cole slaw....I say it shouldn't be wasted on them! Let them go back to their chicken ceasar wrap and diet coke, their regular Monday night dinner out moved to Manhattan - I'll take the history, the deliciousness, and the familiarity of an old friend anytime.

NYC bound

So I'm on an Acela train to NYC - in the quiet car no less. What's up with that? Do we really need to designate a space where there is no noise? Even libraries have opened up to a bit of conversational din.....so it's fascinating to watch people in this cocoon of non-electronic verbal communication - where we can only be receptive and not necessarily interactive. Granted, about half of the seats in this car are empty - people still want distraction - there are crossword puzzles, powerpoint presentations, best sellers and self-help books evident. Could we expand this concept to other areas of our lives? Could we develop quiet offices, quiet restaurants, quiet airplanes? Think of the focus we could give to our own thoughts versus the throes of group decision-making.

Maybe this would be a good idea for Congress. Put them all in a quiet car and make them think about their legislative decisions and their effect. Would they begin to hear the common sense voices in their minds going - what the hell were we thinking? Or would any rational thought still be blocked from years of deterioration. Being alone with your thoughts and THINKING can be a valuable too. It lets that little voice in your head come forward and ask you questions you don't want to necessarily answer.

Silence feeds the imagination. I'm going to imagine for a while....

Experiential

Pondering how we learn - some of us learn by rote, some of us by example, and some of us by experience - is there any advantage to one over the other? Well, my bias is toward experiential learning - why, because it's the most personal of them. Let's plug an example in - let's use the notion of love - by rote, one would learn that love is an emotion expressed toward a person or object to which one is attached - by example, one could use the relationship in literature of Romeo and Juliet - by experience, one could refer to a parental, partner, or friend relationship. To have the full understanding of a concept, I believe one has to have the experience to its fullest. That means throwing oneself fully into the experience to learn the good, the bad, and the muddy middle.

I use love as the example because it is one side of the powerful emotional coin - the other side being hate, and I don't want to explore that just yet....To understand, comprehend, and appreciate the experience of love, one has to be willing to be vulnerable, to be seen by another person, to be rejected, to be judged, to be appreciated and cherished. It is only in the reflection of another with whom this vulnerability is allowed can this emotion be understood. Love is a many splendid thing but it is usually accompanied with jealousy, self-doubt, and preconceived notions. Yay!